Can Platonic Relationships Work?

When Harry said to Sally “A man and woman can never be friends” in the movie ‘When Harry Met Sally’, millions of people might have been able to identify with the statement. While romantic relationships keep intriguing novelists, movie makers and scholars, platonic relationships – a relationship between a man and a woman without any romance or sex, are also a niche subject creating much interest. What really interests most is whether platonic relationships can stand the test of time.

One of the reasons scholars feel that platonic relationships can not work is genetics. Our psyche is such that the opposite sex always brings out sexual feelings. It could be because of the pheromones that the members of the opposite sex emanate. So strong is the feeling that even the mental image of someone from the opposite sex can trigger sexual responses.

When one thinks about how people always want to be friends first before becoming romantically entangled, there arises the question; can an inter-sex friendship survive human instinct?

Even though everyday we run into men and women who are ‘just friends’, it is not always easy to maintain platonic relationships. When one person develops romantic feelings towards the other, but the other views them as just a friend, the dynamics of the relationship change forever, mostly for the worse. The platonic relationship of course sees red.

Being in love and not having the feeling returned is a very painful and difficult situation. More often than not, people prefer to not continue this kind of a relationship and look for someone who loves them back with the same intensity. The platonic relationship can therefore mutually end at this point. Some people, even if they develop romantic feeling towards their friends, remain friends with them and try to not get their romantic inclinations in the way.

That art however is difficult to master and most people prefer to part ways. Historically, there have been many examples of platonic relationships. Today, women enjoy an equal status as men and we see more and more platonic relationships blossoming and staying strong for years. Platonic relationships therefore do exist. Their continuity however, depends on how strong the bond between the two friends is.