Competition In a Relationship: Is It Healthy?

The world is such today that competition has become a way of life. We compete for jobs, we compete for attention, we compete for career growth, and we even compete for love. In a way, we get so attuned to competition that it becomes a vital part of our behavior.

In a relationship too, sometimes, just out of habit we tend to become competitive. The two people in a relationship come with their own ambitions and aspirations. Often, these urges can be competitive. Who compromises more, who loves more, who bickers more, who understands more, the list could go on and on.

Ideally, this spirit of competition should bring out the best in the two people. Each of them should draw inspiration from the other and both learn from each other. If one partner is feeling low, the other’s drive could recharge and energize them. Unfortunately, we do not live in an ideal world and sometimes, against the best of our judgment, we tend to fall prey to our ego and feel threatened by things which actually should not bother us much.

Constructive competition either doesn’t exist or is misconstrued. If you do not check your competitive spirit in time, you will be left with conflicts and arguments that begin but don’t end unless one of you gets hurt badly. What begins as an innocent remark like ‘I am more tired than you because I worked more today’, could get blown away out of proportion and your house becomes a constant battle ground.

A little bit of competition in a relationship can be healthy, provided that no one rues being in the second place. When both the partners really want to become better, competition can actually do wonders for the relationship. However, when the competitive spirit invades all the activities that you did together, trouble could brew. It is not always easy for one person to take everything with a pinch of salt. So remember why you are in the relationship. It’s not because you are better than the other, it’s because you are in love.